Wednesday 3 April 2013

One year on

It’s a long time since I’ve felt like writing but feel I must this week as 6 April approaches, marking the first anniversary of Simon’s death. The year has gone so quickly and apart from the obvious not much else has changed. I haven’t wanted to make dramatic changes at home or in my life; flying off somewhere exotic, engaging in a social whirl, reinventing myself or withdrawing completely have not interested me. I’ve just wanted things to continue as they were. There’s always a lot to do, too much really and sometimes I’ve felt like the bird that somehow managed to get into the loft one night. It woke me up flapping about and trying to find a way out. I rush around madly and sometimes I think for what purpose. I’m fit and healthy – what should I be aiming for in the next twenty years?

I can't work how to get this the right way up!
 During Lent I was following Christian Aid’s ‘Count Your Blessings’ and Paula Gooder and Peter Babington’s ‘Love Life Live Lent Be the Change!’ little book of reflections and I’m missing them. It’s good to be reminded of how fortunate I am and we are living in the UK, for example 2.5billion people in the world do not have somewhere safe, private or hygienic to go to the toilet. It’s also been good to consider positives rather than negatives every day so I think I will start at the beginning and read through them again. Some reflections have really resonated with me – Be more curious, Be more peaceful, Remember more, Have more fun!

Grace was home for Easter weekend and we did lots of ordinary but nice things together. She did a twenty mile run, her last long run before the London marathon in less than three weeks time now. She was very touched when several villagers she’s known all her life sponsored her after reading something she’d written about MSA for the village magazine. She’s now got over £1,200 sponsorship representing lots of small donations which is very encouraging and keeps her going.
Mark and his family are coming to see me tomorrow and he’s bringing his book, ‘Black Market Britain 1939 to 1955’ with him. It was published last week by Oxford University Press. You can buy it on Amazon for a mere £52!! Simon would have been so pleased and delighted as it has been a long time coming and he was constantly chivvying him about it.
On the home front my home roof is being redone and has not been without incident. Part of an old chimney fell into the loft when it was being dismantled, thankfully the floored part of the loft and the snow and strong easterly winds arrived the day after all the Yorkshire stone slates were removed. Needless to say I didn’t sleep much for three nights and water from melting snow found its ways through the bedroom ceilings.
On the actual anniversary of Simon’s death on Saturday I will be in my village church as a guest at my friend’s daughter’s wedding and on the following day I’m joining a Golden Wedding Anniversary lunch in a local pub. Mary and John were one of the first couples we got to know when we moved to the village so our friendship goes back a long way. Relationships are so important aren’t they?
The last picture taken of Simon in February 2012 - he's trying hard to smile